I pushed open the door of the crypt with my foot, walked in, and set a cardboard box down on Spike’s sarcophagus. It hadn’t felt heavy when I started out, but it was feeling pretty darn heavy now, and I was glad to put it down. “Spike, I’m here,” I called, and then I climbed down the ladder.
A single candle was burning again, and I could just make out that Spike was still lying in bed. I found my way to the lamp, but I hesitated before switching it on. “Are you awake?” I asked softly.
“Yeah, Red,” he replied. “Thanks for coming.”
I switched on the lamp. “Hey, I told you I’d come, didn’t I? Let me have a look at you, Spike, gonna check you out.” He raised himself up on his elbows and I peered at his face. The swelling had gone down significantly, but the bruising had turned into a sullen black and purple mottling, pretty nasty looking. I could get a good look at his eyes now and, as I looked closely, I could see that they were red and there were damp streaks on his cheeks. “Spike – have you been crying?”
“No! Me crying? Are you off your trolley?”
“Spike, it’s okay,” I told him softly. “I’ve seen you cry. I know you’re a tough guy, okay? But sometimes, I guess everybody has to cry.”
“Only pathetic wankers cry,” Spike muttered. “Girls, yeah, it’s okay for them. Not blokes.”
“No, really, Spike, it’s okay,” I said. I reached out carefully, put my arm around him, and gave him a little hug. “I don’t think less of you. And, I promise, there will be no telling of Xander.”
“Better bloody not,” Spike said, with more of a sniffle than a snarl. “Hate this. Makes me feel like a useless sodding poofter. But …” he gave me a little hug back, “you’re making me feel better, Red. Thanks. You’re a …” His voice faltered and stopped.
“Friend?” I completed his sentence. “We can be friends if you like, Spike.”
“Thought we were, before,” he said, and I could hear a tinge of bitterness in his tone.
I could feel my cheeks getting a little hot and I lowered my eyes. “Last summer. Yeah. We were, or we should have been, except that I was all with the ‘bring back Buffy’ plan and I didn’t let you in on it. And, yeah, you were right and I was wrong. Since then I’ve been doing one dumb thing after another. Hey, I think maybe not being friends with you is one of the dumb things.”
“Really?” There was a bit of a tremble in Spike’s voice. He lifted a hand to touch my hair and then let it fall. “Dunno if I can trust you. I remember ‘We’ll never be friends’.”
“Hey, no fair, that was Giles, not me,” I reminded him. “And, you know, maybe he might have changed his mind. That was a long time ago, a lot’s happened since then.”
“Yeah, well, ‘I’ll never want your opinion’ wasn’t that long ago,” Spike muttered.
“And a few minutes after that you saved Buffy’s life when we were all just standing there like statues. Hey, a few days later you and him were all big with the father and son act. If he hasn’t changed his mind, well, he totally should have done.” I was getting new insights into Spike. It looked like he really did want to be our friend, probably had done for a while, and we’d been giving him the big brush-off. Spike had been big with not looking like he was caring, so we hadn’t realized, but he wasn’t exactly in any shape to keep up the Big Bad image so he was letting it show now. He must have been getting pretty lonely, I guessed. He couldn’t have many demon friends left since he’d started helping the Slayer; maybe that guy Clem was the only one. I felt sorry for him, and, yeah, guilty about the brush-off thing, and more guilt was something I didn’t need right now. Olive branch time? “Hey, something else Giles said, about ‘we are not your way to Buffy, there is no way to Buffy’. Well, I don’t know if there is or not, but if there is, I won’t stand in it. In your way, that is.”
“There is no way for me to Buffy,” Spike said heavily. “She’ll never be my girl, I know that now. But thanks.”
I frowned. This wasn’t like Spike. He wasn’t one to just accept things. I’d seen him take setback after setback and still come up swinging. Well, yeah, after he was first chipped and was living in Xander’s basement he got so down he was going to dust himself, but that was pretty special circumstances and he cheered right up after he found that he could still hit demons. He’d had years to adjust since then. Okay, yeah, getting beat up by humans and not being able to fight back must have sucked dead rats through a straw, but he didn’t seem angry, just, well, beaten. Defeated. “Uh,” I began, but then I couldn’t quite bring myself to say right out that he wasn’t to give up on getting, well, into Buffy’s pants. I let go of the hug and changed the subject instead. “Hey, you said you hadn’t seen Dawn for a while, right? That’s not fair on either of you. How about we take her to the movies tomorrow night?”
“What, me and you and Dawn?”
“Yeah, why not? I owe her a trip to the movies. Last time I said I’d take her I got sidetracked and, well, there was badness, and broken arms, and you taking her to the hospital. Dawn’s still mad at me over that. I want to make it up to her, but she might not trust me; but if you come too then she’ll come. So, you can help me out and get to see Dawn all at the same time.”
“That’d be right nice, pet,” Spike said, smiling properly for the first time since I’d found him being helped out of the alley. “As long as my face has healed enough so it won’t upset the Bit.”
“So, maybe we should make it the day after tomorrow, give you a bit more chance to heal?”
“Not a bad idea, Red.” He cocked his head. “What’s the movie? Dunno if I could take some soppy chick flick.”
“I thought maybe ‘The Fellowship of the Ring’?”
“That still showing? Thought it’d have gone by now.”
“Nope, it’s still packing them in. So, you up for it? Not too much of a chick flick for you?”
“Suppose I could put up with it,” Spike said, as if he was making a big concession.
I had a feeling that he was more enthusiastic than he was willing to reveal, but I let it pass. “I’ll ask Dawn tonight, then. If she won’t come, we’ll go together.”
“The two of us going to the movies? Xander’d do his sodding nut over that.”
“Whatever a ‘sodding nut’ is, you’re probably right. So we wouldn’t tell him. But hey, can’t see Dawn turning down a movie trip with you. Me, maybe, I let her down last time, but not you.”
“Hope not. I’ve missed seeing Nibblet these past weeks.” Spike shuffled along the bed under the covers and reached for his T-shirt. “Gonna get up and dressed now, Red. I’m getting hungry.”
I stood up. “That reminds me, I’ve gotten you a present. It’s upstairs.”
“Got me some fresh blood, did you? Ta, pet. Now, you’d better get upstairs unless you want a show; I’m starkers under here.”
“Oh. Yeah.” I could feel my cheeks burning. “Right, I’ll, uh, see you upstairs.”
“It’s pretty old. Doesn’t have any fancy settings and it’s not big on the power,” I said. “Is it okay?”
“Bloody marvelous, pet,” Spike beamed. “Just use the defrost and low settings for blood, anyway. Although it’ll be nice being able to heat up buffalo wings and what have you.” He stroked the top of the battered old microwave almost as if caressing it. “Lovely. Thanks a million, Red.”
“It’s no big deal.” I shrugged my shoulders. “I asked around at class, one of the girls was going to throw this out or Freecycle it, she gave it to me for the price of a coffee, that’s all.”
“Still a big deal to me, love. Thought that counts, innit?” He sighed. “Long time since anyone ‘cept Nibblet got me a prezzie.” He positioned the microwave, disconnected the kettle, and plugged in the new gadget in its place.
He was so grateful for such a simple thing. It was sorta sweet, really. “It’s not that big a deal,” I said. “Hey, maybe you can help me out a bit in return.” He looked a bit disappointed, must have been thinking that I was only helping him for what I could get in return, so I went on quickly so that he could see that I wasn’t just doing that. “I’m kinda stuck for what to get Buffy for her birthday. I can only think of really lame things, you know? Maybe you can help me come up with something she’d actually like.”
“Dunno how much help I can be, pet.” He smiled once more. “Day I ever figure out what the Slayer likes there’ll be a bloody parade. Seventy-six trombones, the works. But I’ll do my best. Maybe your ideas might not be so lame, love. You’re a smart girl. What’ve you thought of so far?”
“Well,” I said, “I was thinking maybe, a, perhaps, a, a back massager.” My hands started fluttering around like butterflies.
Spike tilted his head to one side and grinned at me. “You mean a vibrator, pet? Think the Slayer might be a bit frustrated, then?”
I think I probably blushed. “Well, yeah, I guess it is a vibrator. Only, not the sort that’s shaped, well, you know, that’s a bit too obvious.”
“One of those Rabbit ones might go down better,” Spike suggested. “Well, when I say ‘go down’, I don’t mean it like that. It’d knock her teeth out.”
I frowned for a second until the double meaning registered and then burst out laughing. “Hey, if I did get her one of the Rabbit ones she could chase Anya with it.”
“Be the first time Demon Bird ever ran from something that could give her orgasms,” Spike chuckled.
“Yeah,” I agreed, and snickered. “Eek, bunnies! Yay, orgasms!” I dotted my head back and forth between phrases. “Eek, bunnies! Yay, orgasms!” I shared a moment of laughter with Spike and then calmed down. “Anyway, seriously, Spike, do you have any ideas?”
“Something sharp and shiny, maybe?” Spike pursed his lips and was obviously thinking hard. He took out a container of blood and placed it in the microwave. “Tell you what, Red. The Slayer’s a crap cook and that DoubleMeat rubbish does sod all for her. Take her out for a proper restaurant meal, or get her a voucher or what have you for her and Dawn to go.”
“That’s a really good idea,” I praised. “Hey, maybe I could make it for her to go with you.”
“Don’t think that’d go down too well, pet. But thanks for saying it.” He switched on the microwave and watched the blood revolve. “Thanks for everything.”
Watching the movie with Spike and Dawn was fun. I paid for the movie, Spike bought the soda and popcorn, and he behaved himself pretty well. I was a bit worried in case he’d talk through it, but no, he hardly said anything while it was showing, just in the intermission. Big surprise was that he’d read the books, and what he said in the intermission and afterwards was pretty much what I was thinking, only maybe funnier. It had never occurred to me that William the Bloody might have read ‘The Lord of the Rings’.
Afterwards we walked back to Revello Drive together. Dawn was chattering away happily, seemed to have had a really good time, and hey, looked like she’d forgiven me for the last time, when I’d promised her a movie and given her a night stuck in a boring waiting room and then a broken arm. So that was definitely of the good.
I could tell that it was bringing Spike along that had been the big deal to Dawnie. He was sorta like a big brother to her, I guess. I don’t know what Buffy was thinking trying to keep them apart because, hey, not so much Spike a bad influence on Dawn, more Dawn a good influence on Spike. Like he really tried to be a good role model for her.
I’d had a good time. Really. I was feeling kinda warm and glow-y, just from doing normal things and helping Spike out and making up with Dawn. The rush from getting high on magic, yeah that had been good, but the aftermath was definitely of the bad, no warm glowies involved, and this was just so much better. And, making things right with spells? So not as good as this. If I could just keep that in mind then I could beat the, well, I called it ‘addiction’, although I guess it wasn’t really; ‘cept maybe the same way as, like, gambling addiction. Anyway, I could do it. I could be ‘do things the right way’ Willow. Then maybe I could get Tara back.
“We should do this again some time,” I suggested. “The three of us.”
“Yay!” Dawn said, with a great big smile. “We so should.”
“I’m not going to argue with my two favorite ladies,” Spike said. He was smiling at Dawn in a way that I could only describe as ‘fondly’. Evil vampire? I just couldn’t see it any more.
“Two favorite apart from Buffy, you mean,” Dawn corrected him.
“Well, yeah, goes without saying, dunnit?” Spike agreed. His smile had gone. I looked at him sharply. I wasn’t convinced that he was being sincere.
Dawn seemed to be satisfied, however, and she gave him another great big smile. “Coming in for hot chocolate, Spike?”
Spike stopped in his tracks. “I’d love to, Nibs, but your Sis wouldn’t be too keen.”
Dawn stuck out her lower lip. “Buffy can bite my ass. You’re my friend and I want you to come in. Anyway, she’s working late tonight. You have more than an hour.”
“In that case, lead me to the monkey brains,” Spike agreed.
Dawn went ‘Eww!’ at that name for the marshmallows, and they grinned at each other. It was like they’d been the summer before, only happier because of not having that big ‘Buffy is dead’ factor, and, hey, I felt pretty good about it.
I made the hot chocolate and they sat down on the couch and started to argue about what to watch on TV. I kept half an eye on them and noticed Spike slipping something to Dawn, probably not intending me to see, and there was a bit of whispering between them. I didn’t let on that I’d noticed, but I was a bit disappointed. Was Spike up to something not of the good after all? Although, I didn’t want to spoil the evening with a fight, and it might have been something okay. Maybe just him giving her extra pocket money ‘cause things were a bit tight in the Buffy household. Yeah, that was probably it. So I didn’t say anything and just brought in the hot chocolate and joined them on the couch.
Spike began to fidget when it got near the time for Buffy to come home, and he said that he’d have to be going. He told Dawn that hopefully he’d see her next week.
Dawn gave him her eye roll treatment. “You’ll see me at Buffy’s party on Sunday, Spike.”
“Not invited, Bit,” he replied.
“What?” I was pretty surprised. “She hasn’t invited you?”
“Well, no,” Spike said, and he sounded a little bitter about it. “Evil soulless vampire here, not welcome at the Slayer’s party.”
“She said that? That’s just mean after all you’ve done for her.” I wasn’t just surprised, I was annoyed at Buffy.
“Well, she didn’t tell me not to come, she just didn’t invite me,” Spike said.
That was more like it. Buffy probably just hadn’t invited him because she expected him to turn up anyway. “Well, I invite you,” I told him, just to make sure. “You’re part of the team, like I said.”
“Yeah, and I invite you too.” Dawn poked Spike in the shoulder. “I bet Buffy just took it for granted you’d be coming, you big doofus, and she’d be all upset if you didn’t show.”
“Think you’re overrating my importance, Nibblet,” Spike muttered.
“Well, you’re coming anyway, aren’t you?” Dawn demanded.
“I’ve made a poker date with Clem for Sunday,” Spike said, his brow furrowing. “Don’t like to disappoint him after he helped me out the other day. Saved my life, he did, him and Willow.”
“Who’s Clem?” Dawn wanted to know.
“He’s a really nice demon,” I told her.
“Oh,” Dawn said, looking a bit unsure.
“Don’t suppose I could bring him, could I?” Spike suggested. “Slayer’s met him before.”
I hesitated. Demon and Slayer’s birthday, not mixy things; only, Clem was pretty nice, and if Buffy had met him before then maybe it would be okay. The meeting must have gone okay otherwise Spike wouldn’t have wanted to invite Clem. And, hey, gonna be plenty of demons at Xander and Anya’s wedding, after all. I was still thinking about it when Dawn spoke up.
“A friendly demon? Cool. Does he have horns?”
“’Fraid not, Bit. He plays a mean game of Trivial Pursuit, though.”
“Yeah, okay,” I decided. “Bring Clem. But he’ll have to go if Buffy objects, right?”
“Fair enough. Right, then, Nibblet, see you Sunday.”
I followed Spike out as he left. “Spike, what was it you were passing to Dawn while I was making the hot chocolate?” I tried to keep my voice light, didn’t want him to think I was accusing him of anything.
Spike took his cigarettes from his coat pocket and lit one before replying. “Gave her forty bucks towards a prezzie for her Sis. Had an idea I might be a bit short of dosh, want her to be able to get something nice.”
“Oh. That’s – that’s sweet of you, Spike. You’re really good to Dawn.”
“Try to be,” Spike muttered.
“You are. If Buffy thinks you’re a bad influence, well, she’s being a poop-head.”
“The Slayer a poop-head?” A broad grin spread across Spike’s face. “You’re a treasure, Red. Love the things you come up with. Night, then, see you at the party.”
“Goodnight, Spike, thanks for a really nice night. See you.”